2003-12-08 - 11:03 p.m.
dear diary..
we were in the jacuzzi and .. fuck .. i feel like a bag of fuckola..
we were in the jacuzzi and watching our knee remember that?.. yeah that knee w/the wart on it.. ok well it wasn't actually a wart but we thought it was remember?...
yeah way back a long time ago.. on our knee... there was a little white spot or smooth something.. about the size of a pinhead.. which not a lot of people would even care about or notice.. but we notice everything because we're very picky when it comes to body parts.. anyway, we noticed this little dot and we thought, "is this a mole or a scar or a white cancer dot or tattoo i forgot about..?" ..and we started to dwell on it and pick at it and wonder what it was.. and then we even decided that it must be dangerous or at the very least ugly to have near us.. so we pick it off..and then it scabbed over ..and a bigger callous was left in its place.. so we picked at it again.. and at times it would bleed like a stuck pig because we would notice it every now and then and get angry at it and pick at it.. and then one time in the spa, it looked like murder because we basically Highlandered its white head off with one sharp determined nail swipe..and it gushed.. and then it actually did start to look like a wart.. it must be a wart.. so we thought we would go buy some Compound W wart remover and even if it wasn't a wart and was just a little white spot that we over-picked, that grew into its own large white cauliflower headquarters at the tip of our knee, the Compound W would chew it off or do whatever Compound W does to wart/skin.. and we realized that Compound W deadens skin somehow .. and it scabs over and then is easily removed..
but it, the big vague white, came back again and again and again and again, whatever we did to try and kill it, it arose stronger like a vengeful white phoenix squatter, saying "this property is mine and i'm not leaving." And it reminded us of that little boy named Alex in 2nd grade that used to give us a good squeeze during roll call and let us pick him up and threaten to body slam him into the asphalt (even while he begged us to do it).. yeah, Alex, the one the gorgeous Curious George face and the equally repulsive #2 pencil eraser high WART ON HIS LEFT KNEE.. the one we cringed at when he skinned his knee and the wart was hanging off it by mere DNA strands.. the skin crawling viral buddy.. the kid we loved and never really cared about the wart on his knee.. even though we would condemn our own scarlet letter W in silence..
so we did the only thing we could do..
we ignored it..
and it still stared at us in social settings when we wore shorts.. and we were self conscious about it..and sat at a casual straight left-legged angle to avoid showing off our unwanted hitchhiker..
and then eventually we forgot about it altogether..even during sedentary nights in the jacuzzi with not much to do but , eat tacos, drink gatorade, and stare at the lower half of our body.. and turned just so in other people's company to keep his embarrassing presence confined to tabloid credibility..
and then one night...about 3 or 4 nights ago.. we looked down at our knee.. thinking about the whereabouts of our old unofficial neighbor.. and we looked at our knee again carefully, not necessarily dreading him as we had by now grown accustomed to his deformed eraser-hard body..
...and he was gone..
gone.
or had moved..
or was hiding..
we weren't too immediately convinced-- taking a startled slow tour of our knee seemed like a good idea... and sure enough, he had fled the country to escape accusations of molecular grandstanding.. a little white flat landing strip of faded recognition marked his toppled regime.. where had he gone.. what was he doing with his life now.. would he become a full fledged wart in his future dealings w/people.. or would he visit someone else's knee as the notorious white dot drifter running the same shell game on some other gullible body conscious patron ..
the moral of the story is: writing down insignificant crap is a conventional way of saying i'm lonely.
